What To Say When You Don’t Know What To Say

Communication is so important, but there are times when it can be difficult.  So what do you say when your significant other doesn’t want to talk about it?  How can you establish a dialogue?

Yesterday I ran across one solution.  It’s something of a self-help book entitled Please Read This for Me: How to Tell the Man You Love Things You Can’t Put into Words by Neil Chesanow and Garth Lauren Esersky.  The summary on Amazon.com describes it this way —

He won’t, or can’t, talk about it. She must talk about it–or get angrier, or more frustrated, or more depressed. This situation is faced every day by millions of women who love men who can’t open up. Here, the authors provide 150 “emotional telegrams” that will help women put into words what they want to say.

As you can tell, its target audience is primarily women.  And the book’s unique approach is that is not general advice; it provides actual scripts for different situations.  For example, you’ve decided you want to have a baby, but your spouse isn’t sold on the idea.  Here’s a way to start the discussion.

Unfortunately, the book is out of print (it was originally published in 1988) and used copies are pricey.   But you might be able to find it in a library.

Anything to improve a relationship.



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